Monday, March 26, 2007

F*ck All Dis Sh*t

I like to cuss. My dad was (still is, actually) a big cusser. My friends and I all thought it was cool to cuss, starting around age 8 or 9. Along with farting, I'd say cussing is one of my longest standing amusements.

It's Monday morning. I need to get started on some serious "catch-up" at work. But, I thought I'd share a few of my favorites:

My current favorite to use around the house: Jee-zus H. titty-fuck Christ

Favorite from my college roommate, upon looking out the window and seeing a rather heavy snowfall on the morning of a final exam: Oh, my fucking, shitsucking God

Favorite oops-I-tried-to-stop-from-cussing by one of my very best friends down the street: God-fucking-darn it

Only thing I remember enjoying about Natural Born Killers: learning what the "H" stood for from the Tommy Lee Jones character: Jesus Harold Christ

Random cussing line from an old NWA song that just popped into my head: MC Ren is the muthafuckin' coroner/I'm gettin' rid of muthafuckas as if they was a foreigner

A quick Geto Boys classic: Somebody tell that country-ass hick/To go suck a dead man's dick

Finally, a special shout out to Richard Pryor for taking cussing to stratospheric comedic heights, and to "Frank" (Dennis Hopper) from Blue Velvet and "Gunnery Sgt. Hartman" (R. Lee Ermey) from Full Metal Jacket for breathing cinematic life into cussing.

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Blogger Grant Miller said...

Fuck that shit.

12:04 PM, March 26, 2007  
Blogger haahnster said...

Amen, brotha.

1:58 PM, March 26, 2007  
Blogger mat said...

Ahhh the cussing! Lets not forget about Joe Pesci in "Goodfellas" (or "Casino" for that matter) and that wonderful stoner
Jay in any of the Kevin Smith movies!

5:05 PM, March 26, 2007  
Blogger Old Lady said...

I thought the 'H' stood for Holy.

Well, I too confess that I have potty mouth beyond belief. It's my multiple personality complex that does it. Miss Butter-Wouldn't-Melt-In-My-Mouth to Oh-My-God-Did-She-Say-That! You added some new ones to my portfolio!

10:51 AM, March 27, 2007  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

To wit, a Haahnster walks into a bar and says, "Heineken? Fuck that shit! Pabst Blue Ribbon!"

12:30 PM, March 27, 2007  
Blogger Rob said...

Ah, Bushwick Bill!

11:58 PM, March 29, 2007  

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