Thursday, March 15, 2007

General Paces Peter to Musical Beat

Anonymous sources from deep in the bowels of military power in Washington, DC have informed HH that Gen. Peter Pace will play the lead role in an upcoming XXX musical remake of Patton. "It's a gay porn/musical hybrid. Very experimental as I understand," said one high-ranking official, speaking only with guarantees of anonymity. "It's a remarkable production. Big budget, particularly as gay porn goes."

Said a member of the general's ample staff, "He's perfect for the role! The General has shown an amazing aptitude for maintaining perfect pitch while taking a 12-inch cock in his ass. I don't think anyone else could play that part, and still sell the military-authority angle of the character."

Of course, the news was met with some shock and outrage from conservatives. Said Sen. Sam Browneye, "So much for the General's moral stand. Actions speak louder than words, and this is despicable. Further, I feel it is the worst type of revisionist history. Patton never sang."

For Hollywood, however, it's a natural fit. Said one executive producer of the project, "It's perfect. Most porn stars have to take fake names. With Peter Pace, well, that's just the perfect gay porn name already!"

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3 Comments:

Blogger Old Lady said...

He is correct in stating the policy of the military. He can not espouse an opinion that differs, or he will be booted out. The military is autocratic. Being on the Joint Chiefs he is allowed to say what he said as he is a policy maker.

The military has come a long way regarding policy. Used to be, a pregnant service woman was automatically discharged.

The duty of a person in the military is to wholly support the Commander-in-Chief or get out.

My father explained this to me in great detail when I was a young girl. The militery is not a democracy. It would not survive if it were, neither would we.

My father never strayed from the one quote he often repeated to me,
"I may not agree with what you say, but I defend to the death, your right to say it."

2:22 PM, March 18, 2007  
Blogger Grant Miller said...

I need to read "Catch-22" again.

Anyway, "XXX version of Patton" very funny line.

4:38 PM, March 19, 2007  
Blogger haahnster said...

OL: Peter Pace is a closeted homosexual. Just look at his pretty mouth. (That's a joke...perhaps!)

GM: I LOVE that book. Slaughterhouse Five is another classic cast from a similar mold.

4:52 PM, March 19, 2007  

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