General Paces Peter to Musical Beat

Anonymous sources from deep in the bowels of military power in Washington, DC have informed HH that Gen. Peter Pace will play the lead role in an upcoming XXX musical remake of Patton. "It's a gay porn/musical hybrid. Very experimental as I understand," said one high-ranking official, speaking only with guarantees of anonymity. "It's a remarkable production. Big budget, particularly as gay porn goes."

Said a member of the general's ample staff, "He's perfect for the role! The General has shown an amazing aptitude for maintaining perfect pitch while taking a 12-inch cock in his ass. I don't think anyone else could play that part, and still sell the military-authority angle of the character."

Of course, the news was met with some shock and outrage from conservatives. Said Sen. Sam Browneye, "So much for the General's moral stand. Actions speak louder than words, and this is despicable. Further, I feel it is the worst type of revisionist history. Patton never sang."

For Hollywood, however, it's a natural fit. Said one executive producer of the project, "It's perfect. Most porn stars have to take fake names. With Peter Pace, well, that's just the perfect gay porn name already!"